21st Century Friendships

Creating, Building, and Maintaining Friendships in an Ultra-Connected Time

How to Escape the Aquaintance-Zone (In Friendships)

on May 16, 2014

We all have met an awesome person. Maybe it was through a Facebook group, or at a party of a mutual friend. You exchange Facebook information, maybe even phone numbers. You want to become friends with this person, actual friends.

How do you do it?

My first suggestion is to be observant. Pay attention to what’s going on via their Facebook Wall. Don’t just “like” their posts, actually pay attention to them. You will learn a lot about a person this way.

Maybe they want to go do an activity but need a partner in crime? Don’t just like the post, respond to it. Offer to go!

Maybe they are going to a cool concert this weekend of a band you love. Tell them you’ll be there. Of to maybe hang out.

The thing about taking a friendship from acquaintance to actual friend is time and experiences. It takes time, very rarely does anyone go from stranger to really close friend overnight. It also takes shared experiences, the kind that create stories and inside jokes. When you think back on your close friends, your mind goes through all the fun times you’ve had together.

My biggest fear is going overboard. I always worry that I contact too often, or make too many suggestions of what to do. This “negative self talk” keeps me from reaching out to people at all. You would be amazed how many people don’t reach out because  they are worried about seeming to “needy.” They might just be waiting for you to make the first move.


6 responses to “How to Escape the Aquaintance-Zone (In Friendships)

  1. disconcerted72 says:

    Ah yes, the fear of being labled a “Facebook Stalker”…lol
    Oddly enough, social media came out when I was well into my adulthood, so the whole not knowing what to do about people you’re connected to is somewhat of an mystery to me, since I only have connections to people I know in “real” life…
    But I think information you’re providing will certainly be of some value to those that are avid social media users.
    Great post!

  2. Gerri says:

    I am an introvert (for the sake of a label), but, I’m finding with this blogging stuff, I make more of an effort to comment and respond. Even doing that more on fb. I’m sure if someone thought you were a stalker…they would shut you down. Great post! …and thanks for the follow!

  3. […] How to Escape the Acquaintance-Zone (In Friendships) […]

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